Something I read.....

"It is your power to torment the God-cursed slaveholders, that they would be glad to let you go free....But you are a patient people. You act as though you were made for the special use of these devils. You act as though your daughters were born to pamper the lusts of your masters and overseers. And worse that all, you tamely submit, while your lords tear your wives from your embraces, and defile them before your eyes. In the name of God we ask, are you men?....Heaven, as with a voice of thunder, calls on you to arise from the dust. Let your motto be RESISTANCE! RESISTANCE! RESISTANCE! No oppressed people have ever secured their Liberty without resistance." -Henry Highland Garnet, "Address to the Slaves of the United States of America."

You can't tell me that that doesn't move you. Even then women felt helpless. I don't know why I've been on this kick latley. I guess it all goes back to, I'm not a big person. I'm pretty much at the whim of someone else. While that's not a bad thing, if I'm joking around with the person, but the minute it becomes something more what am I suppose to do? I didn't realize how weak I was. It's a scary thought. Does it make me stronger that I recoginze this? Does it make me stronger that I always keep my guard up? (When I'm around people I don't know, or when I'm around big people who I don't know.) I'm not sure that it does. I don't know. I don't want to feel like I have to depend on someone to take care of me. I was raised to believe that I can take care of myself, but latley I'm feeling like I can't. Maybe that's not such a bad thing. At least I'm not living in a fake world where nothing bad can happen to me anymore. That's not how the world really works. If someone who is bigger then me wants to hurt me they will. At least I can recognize who to stay away from. See that leads to my bigger point, is that a good idea? To stay away from people? To cut myself off from people, just because they are bigger then me? My sister is 6'1'', my dad 6'2'' my brother the same. I've been surrounded by big people my entire life, so why do they scare me? I always said that I would never let myself get anywhere near someone who was bigger then me unless they were related. Look at me now.....Chris is 6'5''. Why is it that I'm afraid of big people? People with power? Dr. Atteberry made a good point the other day in class when we were talking about the differences between men and women. We are wired differently. Let's think about this,

Men like:
Power
Strength
Money

Why do they like these things?
Power- come on what man doesn't want to feel like he has complete control over every situation. Weather his girl is involved or not. No man wants to feel threatened.
Strength- the same. No man wants to be looked at as weak. He want's to show off for her, and
make her feel like she's safe with him.
Money- most guys think that buying us lots of presents will buy our affection. So of course money is always nice to have on hand. (Here is a hint, most of us don't care about money, or what it can buy)

I could generalize women, but what would be the point? (and this is my journal.) I guess we both worry about things. I'm going to have to put more time into this thought.

~Unaffected~