Potato Salad

Did you ever get the feeling that no matter what you do, how you do it, or what anyone else says, it's just never going to be good enough? I just can't seem to shake that feeling today. I've been thinking a lot about society and how people are so socially unacceptable. Am I unacceptable? Do I fall into societies trap, and avoid people who are "different" from me? I've come to realize that I will never be the Lorax, because not everyone wants my help. In fact I'm not sure of one person who truly does. I've had a great couple of days, but I feel like in the end I was a complete and utter failure. Sometimes I wonder what my purpose is what am I suppose to do? Am I suppose to be a great lawyer, or president, will I become a four star general? What is the reason for my existence? Sometimes I really feel like I have no existence, I have no purpose. I'm the puppet that people fall back on and depend on time after time. I know that sounds bad, but it isn't ment to. Sometimes I think that I'm ment just to help people out. That "the people" are my existence. I've had people tell me I can and people tell me I can't. In the last few days and I don't know what to believe. I need someone to tell me they believe in me and mean it. I want to know that they mean it. I want to feel it, to know that it's coming from somewhere that no one can make up. I want to feel loved, I want to be needed and cared for, because someone wants to not because they feel like they have to to impress me. I know I'm a bitch, but that's who I am. I know you can get more flies with sugar then you can vinegar, but vinegar at least keeps the morons away. Guys usually tell me that I'm intimidating. I don't know. I guess with ship out day slowly approaching I'm getting more and more nerved up. I'll sleep and see how I feel in the morning.

~Unsure of myself~